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A few tips from those over forty for those over thirty


“If I could go back and start all over again, I would start eating healthy food and go in for sports without stopping. Then I found an excuse, but did not imagine the consequences. "
Writer and entrepreneur Mark Manson appealed to followers of his blog over 37 years old with a request to share his life experience gained from 30 to 40 years. Combining all the answers he received, Mark received an impressive example of collective wisdom:
1. Start taking care of your health now, without delay
Your mind considers itself 10-15 years younger than the real age of your body. Your health will go faster than you think, and you will not even have time to notice it.
Your body does not suddenly break down one day, it is gradually imperceptibly destroyed over the years. Over the next 10 years, you should slow down this destruction.
2Do not communicate with people who treat you badly
Learn to say no to people, actions, and commitments that carry no value to your life. Do not tolerate people who do not treat you well. Do not tolerate them for financial gain. Do not tolerate them for emotional reasons. Do not tolerate them for the sake of your children or your own good.
Usually, people overcome their own limitations, because it seems difficult for them to offend other people's feelings or they fall into the trap, wanting to change another person, like him or make him feel better about himself. It never works. Twenty-year-old world seems open, filled with opportunities, and lack of experience makes them cling to people, even if they do not deserve it. But the thirty-year-olds have already learned that good relations arise with great difficulty, that there are always enough people in the world who are worth making friends with, so there is no reason to waste our time on people who will not support us on our way of life.
3. Be good to those who care about you.
Tragedies happen in the life of everyone, with family and friends of every person.Be the person you can count on at such times. The gap between thirty and forty years is a decade when a lot of problems begin to happen to you and your loved ones, which you might not even think about. Parents are dying, your spouses are dying or changing, children continue to be born, friends are divorced ... The list has no end. You can not imagine, probably, how much you can help a person at a time like this, just being with him, listening, not condemning.
4. You will not achieve everything in the world - focus on what you are doing really well
In life, everything is built on compromises. You sacrifice one thing to get another, and you cannot get both together.
Most people choose their careers at the turn of the twentieth, and, like many other choices made, this is often a mistake. It takes years to find what we are really good at and brings pleasure. It is better to focus on your main strengths and maximize them year after year than to succeed in half something else.
5. Do not be afraid to take risks, you can still change
Although by the age of 30 the majority believes that they should stick to the chosen path, it is never too late to start from the beginning. Society requires us to “decide” by the age of 30 - with a career, marital status, financial situation, etc. However, most of those who answered the questions of Mark Manson argue that you should not allow expectations from an “adult person” to stop you from taking risks and starting everything from the beginning.
6. You must continue to grow and develop.
“You have two assets that you cannot compensate for the loss: your body and your mind. Most of them stop developing and working on themselves after 20. Most 30-year-olds are too busy to worry about self-development. But if you are one of those few who continue to learn, develop their thinking and take care of their mental and physical health, by the age of 40 you will be ahead of your peers by light years. ”
- Stan, 48 years old
Many readers of the blog noted that the decision to sit back at the desk in thirty years is one of the most useful things they have done. Someone enrolled in courses and seminars. Someone first started his business or moved to another country.Someone began to visit a psychologist or began to practice meditation. Your goal number 1 should be the desire to become a better person, partner, parent, friend, colleague, etc. - in other words, to grow as a person.
7. No one understands what he is doing. Get used to it
If you have not yet died - mentally, emotionally, or socially - you cannot predict your life for 5 years ahead. She will not go as you expect. So stop thinking that you can plan ahead, stop tormenting what is happening now, because everything will change, and overcome the desire to control the direction of your life.
8. Invest in your family - it's worth it
Spend more time with loved ones. When you grow up, your relationship changes, and how exactly they change depends on you. Your parents will always see you as a child, until you show yourself as an independent adult. Everybody gets old. Everyone is dying. Use your time to build the right relationships and enjoy family life.
9. Be kind to yourself, respect yourself
Be a little selfish and do something good for yourself every day, something else - every month, and something wonderful - every year.There is no one who cares or thinks about you as much as you do. Life is hard, so learn to love yourself now, because then it will be harder to do.
And finally, important words:
“When I turned forty, my father told me that I would like to be forty years old, because at twenty you think you know everything, at thirty you understand that this is not so, and at forty you can finally relax and just take things as they are. At 58 I want to say that he was right. ”
- Martin, 58 years old.




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